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basics like how many past relationships she’s been in, how many of them she’s had sex with and who was the last. At the same time you must promise (her and yourself) never to entertain these advances from outsiders. Coming to the question of your parents’ reaction – you should remember that your wife is living with your parents.It’s she who’s moved to a new home and made a new family her own, not them.I’d expressed intentions of joining Facebook and connecting with her batch mates in the hope of finding out about her past and whether she had sex before marriage. Normally I would tell you to close your eyes, take a deep breath and let it go.She vehemently opposed this and refused to give away even the names of her classmates. In spite of what all this might suggest, I love her. Usually you achieve nothing by finding out the details of your spouse’s sex-life before he/she met you.And their interference in it is entirely unwelcome.Spouses might have the right to ask each other private questions.My father has recently taunted her with this overheard info first time in three years. At the same time I can’t drive away the visions of her having sex before marriage with another man.
So the middle ground here is to know only as much as is necessary, and in this case you have a right to demand that information from your wife. Tell her first that you love her as she is, and that you have realized that finding out intricate details about her past life is not going to help your relationship. Between the two of you, you might have issues (every couple has).I understand it might be impossible for you to convey this to your parents in as many words. If that’s the case, tell them politely (not in front of your wife, of course) that if they have any questions about your wife, they can ask you, not her, and not in front of her. This disturbed me deeply and we’ve had innumerable discussions about this since then. Recently others in the family eavesdropped on us and unfortunately managed to listen in on some of our private conversations regarding this issue, i.e. This was deeply humiliating and painful for both of us. At a very early stage I’d started suspecting that my wife had had sex before marriage.
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